Moving Beyond Body Hate

move beyond body hate

There is a movement out there all about body love. It’s incredible and motivating, but what about those that aren’t ready for body love. What about those that just want to move beyond body hate.

Most of the women I talk to about body image say they’re nowhere near body love. In fact, many of them are just trying to find a way to not hate their body or be destructive toward it.

Moving beyond body hate

Everyone’s journey is different. There are some incredible activists out there who have spent years dealing with body shaming and are now leaders in the movement of self-love. You can check out some of them on my resources page under the header Body Positive by clicking here. The majority of them will attest that it didn’t happen overnight and it wasn’t always easy to love their body when the world so often told them to hate it.

The path is not always straight from body hate to body love. There are stops along the way for many of us. Sometimes it takes a lot to get going again.

Just getting started on the journey is hard enough.

The first step is knowing your enemy, and the enemy is NOT your body. The enemy is the trash talk in your head. What are the messages that you hear that reinforce this idea that your body is something to be hated and hurt?

My trash talk says I’ll never be good enough, valued, or respected; but if I were thinner and taller and prettier and more lady-like then I’d have it all.

The next part is reminding yourself, every time you hear the trash talk in your head, that you are

  • good enough
  • worthy
  • beautiful
  • desirable
  • powerful
  • fierce

It won’t happen overnight, and that’s okay. The trash talk and body shame have been cultivating for years. It’d be silly of us to think that in a matter of hours, or even days, we could erase it all.

Practice your the positive statements. Repeat them over and over. Maybe right now you don’t have any positive statements to counter the negative ones. Imagine how much easier it will be to deal with the trash talk when your brain has it’s arsenal of positivity standing by.

Everyday we are bombarded by messages telling us we would be better if we used Product X or more accepted if only we looked like the photoshopped, unattainable images in the magazines.

So fight every day. Move away from body hate, every day. Treat your body with kindness because it is not the enemy. Be considerate toward your body that houses you, protects you, and carries you through this harsh world.

If you aren’t ready for body love, that’s okay. How about taking a couple steps away from body hate with me?

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Tamara Duarte

Tamara Duarte is a counselor, author, speaker, and activist. Her private practice, Get Centered Counseling in Vancouver WA, helps women with food and body issues learn to love themselves, their body, their life, and their relationships. Her life’s work is steeped in personal experience, having fifteen years in recovery for anorexia, in addition to being a breast cancer survivor. An up and coming force in the counseling community, Tamara has been published in a textbook called Treatment Strategies for Substance and Process Addictions, and has sat on a panel at the American Counseling Association Conference, where she spoke to her peers on strategies and tools to use with clients struggling with eating disorders. Having a deep, personal understanding of what it takes to recover from this condition, she seeks to be an example to those she treats, to let them know that recovery is possible. Currently developing a podcast which addresses the cultural issues that promote body shame, self-esteem issues and eating disorders, Tamara lives in Vancouver, Washington, with her husband and best friend, Adam, enjoying life to the fullest with their two beautiful children, Jacob and Chloe.